Chloe and I talk about the reality of why you might have a secret wedding if you marry a Korean.

We talked a little bit in the video about friends reactions and as Chloe said, questions about proposals and diamond rings, but I think people really don’t realise how hurtful some comments can be. Especially in western culture, we get so hung up on this idea of when the marriage started on paper that people can say some things without realising how frustrating and hurtful that can be. I’ve had extended family members try to insist that my office registry wedding was my only real wedding. That type of thinking really casts a shadow on the actual weddings we want to share with family and friends and are just inappropriate, because actually it’s our relationship and we get to choose when we publicly commit ourselves to each other. When people are forced by necessity to marry in a government office, others shouldn’t try to lessen that just because it’s not how they expect a marriage to start. From what I’ve seen from other international couples we know, is that regardless of how the marriage started or if there had to be a secret office registry wedding, they are all happy with the choices they made.

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