Category: Relationships (Page 22 of 22)

The idea for this blog first came about when I was idly googling things. About to marry a Korean man, I typed in ‘Korean Husband’. I was shocked at how many negative things came up! There didn’t seem to be anything very positive. What frustrated me was the way things were categorized as ‘Korean Culture’ or ‘that’s how Korean men are’. I found these blanket statements to be quite wrong. A bad experience with a Korean man is more likely to do with his personality and not actually the cultural differences. Just because one person has done something does not mean that everyone of the same nationality does the exact same thing.

My husband and I had been talking about writing a book on and off for a little while. We had an idea to do something together but we weren’t sure exactly what. We knew there were so many things to talk about when two cultures come together, but we wanted it do be positive. The name “My Korean Husband” seemed most natural as it would be in English, for a western audience. It was a name my husband thought suited this project best.

So how do we know what is a real cultural difference and something that is just personality? You have to look deeper, you have to study more, you have to observe more, you have to put aside your own preconceptions. Unfortunately there are probably many people who have entered marriages without ever trying to understand the person they are marrying and their culture.

I was at some advantage because I already had an interest in Korean culture before I met my husband. There is something about Koreans and Korean culture that is immensely fascinating. It gets under your skin and yet at the same time it can be extremely frustrating. Just when you think you’ve made huge progress in understanding it- something else pops up and throws you off balance.

In the preface of his book ‘The Koreans’ Michael Breen discusses this. He mentions how once you become involved in Korea it starts to feel like it is the centre of the world.

“Korea has that effect on you. Its people are so drastic, so passionate, and the twentieth-century issues they have thrashed around with – colonialism, communism, political violence, war, industrial development, democracy, human rights – seem so important, it is easy to forget that Koreans are not well known.” (Breen 2004)

This was written in 1998 (revised 2004) and since then Korean culture has started to become more known, especially in the Asia region though also in some western countries, due to its music, dramas and food. However, the average person still does not know that much about Korea. This is partly due to its location.

“Koreans feel small, because they live amid giants. Their geopolitical neighbors are China, Japan, Russia and America, who between them have done to Korea just about every nasty thing that can be done to a smaller country. The Koreans learned to roll up into a ball and let themselves be kicked in order to survive.” (Breen 2004)

Is this blog all about politics and history though? Not really, though some things will touch on it. Instead this is about a celebration of Korean culture. South Korea has achieved so much in only half a century. What is it like to be Korean now? How is Korean culture spreading through the world? What is it about these expressive people that draw you in? What is it like to be married to a Korean man? What is it like for a Korean man living in a western country like Australia? What is it like as a native English speaker to learn the Korean language? Music, film, food? This is what this blog is about.

… and about drawing cute pictures.

Breen, M 2004, The Koreans, Thomas Dunne Books, New York